Titanic

Note: I'm writing this on 4/7/12, but set it up to delay posting it until after Baby's arrival.


Titanic is being re-released in 3D this week, and it made me realize that the main characters are named Jack and Rose. Rose! That's our name! I really hope people don't think that we're naming our baby after a James Cameron movie. Ugh!  At least this blog suggests that Rose is unlikely to take off in popularity at this point, at least as a first name. But we'll see how her name is trending after the 2011 Social Security names list is released in mid-May...

Titanic's Jack Dawson Only One of Many Heroes Named Jack

Apr 6th 2012

This month marks the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the RMS Titanic and also, in case you haven't noticed the massive marketing campaign, the rerelease of James Cameron's 1997 smash hit Titanic, now in 3D. 

The film didn't do much to spur the popularity of Rose, which was peaking as a top 20 name in the 1910s when the Titanic sank, but has steadily declined. It has plateaued at a rank in the 300s and remained there for the past several decades, now serving as a tremendously popular middle name, especially among celebrity babies. 

Jack, however, is a different story. In the 1910s, Jack was the 23rd most popular name among baby boys and reached its peak during the next decade, slowly declining until the 1980s when it began to climb again. Jack was rising fast by the time Titanic was released, but the film definitely gave it a boost in 1998. 

The name also has an interesting history behind it. Jack was often used as the name for a plucky young hero in legends and fairy tales and was portrayed in a variety of ways -- as a foolish young boy who becomes brave as in Jack and the Beanstalk to a strong and clever young man as he is in Jack the Giant Killer. 

You might even have noticed that all different kinds of heroes in movies, television shows, books and more have been repeatedly dubbed Jack. Besides Jack Dawson, a character that propelled Leo DiCaprio to stardom, Jacks can range from young, brave heroes like Jack "Cowboy" Kelly in the cult musical Newsies to the charming and clever Captain Jack Sparrow in the Pirates of the Caribbean films. Rough and ruthless Jack Bauer from TV series 24, Jack Shepard as the leader of the survivors on Lost and the hero of many Tom Clancy novels, Jack Ryan, are just a few more.

There have been so many, especially recently, that we have almost become accostomed, in a way, to think of characters named Jack as heroes, beginning with the hero Jack of the aforementioned folktales. Though, of course, Jack can also be a great name for an antagonist -- Jack Torrance of The Shining for one.

What do you think of the name Jack? What are some other heroes named Jack/which are your favorites? 

--A.F.

"disorder of lactation"

First off, a huge thanks to everyone who expressed understanding and support after my last breastfeeding post! I feel much less alone knowing that I'm (unfortunately) not the only one to have had trouble in this area, and also knowing that I have a wonderful support network cheering us on! Thank you.

Progress has been really slow on this front - for the past week, we've still pretty much only been able to do two "old fashioned" feedings per day, with the rest being pumped. It's really been taking a toll not only on my sleep but also on my confidence as a mother. So yesterday (Tuesday) we went back to the lactation consultants again. The good news is that the B6 seems to really be helping the Raynaud's / vasospasms, and she also encouraged me to use warm compresses more often and to do whatever I need to do to stay warm (not a problem! I like being warm, and apparently so do my boobs!). The bad news is that this treatment to date hasn't fully fixed the pain problem.

So after much awkward poking, prodding, and analyzing, the new theory as to the cause of my "disorder of lactation" is that I also have an underlying bacterial infection of some sort (in addition to Rose's vigorous sucking and my very sensitive skin and the Raynaud's). Now I have a "prescription" for a homemade ointment (hydrocortisone cream plus polysporin cream) that I have to apply after every feeding, and as a result I'm feeling a little more optimistic again. In addition, since the pain continues to be the worst during the first minute or so of feeding, we're now back to using the nipple shields again. However, we discovered that if I have the nipple shield on during the entire feeding, she only gets a fraction of the milk she needs (she got 10 ml of milk with the shield vs. 2 oz of milk without -- one ounce is about 30 ml, and she needs at least 3 oz of milk per feeding). So we just use the nipple shields for the first minute or two, then we take it off.

Got all that? It's quite a routine, for something that's supposed to be as "simple" and "natural" as breastfeeding.

In other words, here's our new routine (when Mike is not home):
1. Determine that Rose is hungry (which is sometimes hard to figure out!)
2. Feed her the milk I pumped 1.5-3 hours ago, repeatedly telling her to "slow down!" and giving her lots of burp breaks.
3. Lull her to sleep in her bouncy chair.
4. Put on the MotherLove nipple balm (to prevent friction from the pump), then pump for 20+ minutes.
5. Gently rub off the MotherLove and replace it with the hydrocortisone/polysporin cream.
6. Wash all the pump parts.
7. Figure out when she's hungry again.
8. Repeat the above steps. OR, twice per day:
Gently rub off the hydro/poly cream.
9. Place the nipple shield.
10. Try to convince Rose to open a BIG MOUTH.
11. Let her eat for 2 minutes.
12. Remove the nipple shield.
13. Try to get her to latch on with a BIG MOUTH again.
14. Let her eat as long as possible. (She likes to fall asleep after about 2 minutes)
15. Wake her back up again.
16. Place the nipple shield on the other side.
17. Let her eat for 2 minutes.
18. Remove the nipple shield and remind her to use a BIG MOUTH.
19. Hope she eats for more than 2 seconds.
20. Cuddle her to sleep.
21. Put on the hydro/poly cream.
22. Try to rest for 30-120 minutes until she's ready to eat again.

So, as you can see it's still quite a process. BUT, we tried 2 "old-fashioned" feedings (can you even call it that when you're using a nipple shield?) in the last 24 hours, and both involved very, very, very minimal pain - maybe not even pain, but just slight discomfort! I'm super hopeful that this new solution will do the trick, but I'm not going to push it too fast. Please continue to keep your fingers crossed for us!

In cloth!

Rose lost her umbilical stump today, so here she is in her first cloth diaper!!!

Two weeks!

Time is flying and our little girl is growing up so quickly!

Right now she likes:
+ "more milk!"
+ having her hands up by her face
+ laying on her right side
+ being swaddled or strapped into her car seat
+ tummy time

And she does not like:
- having her diaper changed
- putting on new clothes
- sponge baths
- having to "toot"

Her "official" two-week-old portrait:

(Don't you love the penguin pacifier Mike got for her?!)    :)

Superstar!

Rose had another check up today. When she was born she weighed 7#10oz, and when she was discharged she was only 7#2oz - which is totally normal, since most babies lose 5-10% of their birth weight. By their one-week check-up, however, they should have regained about 1/2 to 1 oz per day, but Rose was only at 7#4oz when she was 5 days old. So, we had to go back again today, hoping and praying that she'd be back up to 7#10oz again.

But before I get to the exciting news about today's weight, let me first recount this weird conversation I had in the waiting room with another mom:

(Enter the nice lady carrying her newborn. She proceeds to sit right next to me.)
Her: What a cute baby boy!
Me: (A bit annoyed, because even though Rose wasn't in pink, she was dressed in very gender-neutral clothing.) Actually, she's a girl.
Her: Oh.
Me: Do you have a boy or a girl? (trying to model politeness)
Her: A girl.
(pause)
Her: Her face is all scratched up!
Me: (A little more annoyed) Yeah, I need to trim her nails again. They grow so fast! (attempting to laugh off my discomfort)
Her: So is this her first doctor's appointment?
Me: No, we were in last week but now we're back again to check that she's growing okay.
Her: (slight pause) So there's something wrong with her?

At that point I was super relieved that she and her daughter got called back to see the doctor. Seriously, what weird questions!

Anyway, back to Rose...

So we were praying that she'd get back up to 7#10oz by today. And guess what our little milk monster weighed in at.... 8#5oz!!! Woo-hoo! Our little superstar gained over a pound in just one week!! The best part of this? Now that she's surpassed her birthweight, we don't have to wake her every 3 hours anymore! Double woo-hoo!!  Way to go, Rose!

Pills

Rose is turning me into a pill popper - although definitely not of the "mommy's little helper" variety! I now take:
*ibuprofen (for boob pain)
*Vitamin B6 (same)
*Femdophilis (to ward off yeast infections after all the antibiotics we were both on)
*"mother load" (an herbal remedy to increase milk production)
*prenatal multivitamin
*fish oil
*calcium+d
Whew! Thanks heavens for my pill box, even if it does make me feel about 80 years old to be using one!

breastfeeding

 Why did no one warn me about the horrors of breastfeeding?!? I feel like friends, family, the media, and society in general all showcased a pretty realistic portrayal of the highs and lows of both pregnancy and childbirth. But breastfeeding, on the other hand, has always been portrayed as a relaxing, mother-child bonding time: cue the soft focus camera lenses as mother gazes adoringly at her newborn's sweet face. My experience, however, has been one of clenched toes, stifled sobs, and the searing pain of my nipples being slowly sheared off with a rusty spoon.

It all started well enough in the early hospital hours. The nurses declared her to have an excellent latch, I was producing a decent amount of colostrum, and we started to bond over our brief feeding periods. Of course, I thought, here's the beauty of motherhood! After my awful labor, it seemed only fair that we'd settle right into nursing.

But then the pain started to set in.

I can't describe how awful it got, and how quickly. In the 2+ days we were hospitalized, we met with all three of the official lactation consultants, plus every registered nurse in the special care nursery who earned her LC certificate on the side. After some debate over whether the pain might be caused by her being "tongue tied" (with the requisite treatment being cutting the frenulum in her mouth! No way! Over my dead body!!! Thankfully the pediatrician vetoed this diagnosis almost immediately), all the lactation consultants agreed that my vicious pain was caused by a combination of Rose's extremely vigorous sucking abilities and my extremely sensitive fair skin. Ugh.

Our first solution was to try augmenting our breastfeeding sessions with a feeding tube (like this one). Basically, I'd get Rose latched on, then try to breathe through the pain while Mike inserted the tube into her latch so she'd get extra (pre-pumped) breastmilk from the tube, thus decreasing her need to suck so hard.  That worked for a few days, but by Friday (three days post discharge) even that wasn't enough.

So back to the lactation consultants we went.

After much debate about the pros and cons of various solutions, we eventually landed on our second/current solution: exclusively pumping for 24 hours to give my boobs a break, then slowly adding breastfeeding sessions back in, as tolerable. And when I say slowly adding breastfeeding sessions back in, I mean SLOWLY adding them back in.  On Sunday I completely jumped the gun with 3 breastfeeding sessions in a row, and that caused a huge setback. So now I'm only breastfeeding about one in six times (if that), as that's truly all I can handle. Especially since I also seem to have Raynaud's of the breast, which is likely contributing (or fully causing?) my pain. So now I'm also on a strict regimen of vitamin B6 daily, in the hopes that this will lessen the pain without having to resort to a prescription medication.

Anyway, so this solution (mostly pumping, plus some B6) seems to be working for now. The main drawback is the amount of time that it takes - when Mike is home/awake, he can bottle-feed Rose while I pump, so we're both done within 30 minutes or so. But when he's away/asleep, it takes me 20-30 minutes to feed/burp/diaper Rose, followed by 30 minutes to pump for her next feeding. (I'm usually producing just barely enough milk, but occasionally we have to supplement with some formula). Not bad at one o'clock in the afternoon, but the whole routine feels exponentially longer at one o'clock in the morning (especially if, like last night, it takes an additional 90 minutes to get her back to sleep again afterward).

Like I said, this solution is doable for now, so I'm trying not to get ahead of myself and worrying about whether I'd be able to continue with this in a month or two. (Simply being able to breastfeed would be so much easier!)  Instead, I'm trying to focus on just getting through one feeding at a time.  I'm also reminding myself that formula is not the devil - whatever breastmilk I can give Rose is a huge benefit to her, but it's better for me not to get all stressed and in pain, since then she'll just end up drinking cortisol-laced milk, and she certainly doesn't need any more of my stress hormones! A happy mommy and a healthy baby is the goal, no matter what route it takes to get there - even if that means exclusively pumping and/or supplementing with formula. (Right?)

So please keep your fingers crossed for us that we can gradually increase our breastfeeding sessions over time! Like I said to Mike, I can be massively sleep deprived or I can be in horrific pain, but I can't be a happy mommy when both are happening. So for now we'll continue with the sleep deprivation path and hopefully it will eventually lead us to a pain-free breastfeeding future.